How I Accidentally Went Swimming on Purpose

How does one accidentally go swimming on purpose? Well, keep reading. It starts with kayaking. No, I didn’t accidentally fall in. That would still just be accidentally swimming. Nope, this story has more to it than that. But like I said, it starts with kayaking.


We were having a blast. It was a bit windy, but the water was pretty calm so we decided to cross over to the nearby island. We were about halfway there when the wind picked up and the water got rougher. We were halfway there though, so we opted to continue on instead of going back. Which turned out to be a terrible decision because the water did not improve like we thought it would and by the time we got to the island the water was churning and the wind was strong enough that we couldn’t hear each other.


Now I don’t actually have a real ocean kayak, it’s just a fat little 10-foot thing. I like it because the larger cockpit gives more room for Suki if she decides not to ride on the bow. It’s not, however, great at cutting through the water and I have to take five strokes for every half stroke J needs to propel his kayak. That might be an exaggeration, but it actually might not be. I can get a pretty good clip going if I really try though. On the plus side, put me on a lake and I’ll be able to leave everyone in the dust. Plus ocean kayaking turns into a pretty good workout.


So anyway, I strugged along while J paddled backwards to keep pace with me. I think I was moving an inch a minute. At one point a group of people started cheering me on while I wished very hard they would just turn around and pretend I wasn’t there. I paddled harder and manged to get by, which is when we decided to steer toward a sheltered cove to eat lunch.


When we were about 15 meters out I told J to just paddle ahead and we’d meet him at shore. When he was about halfway between us and the shore a wave sent Suki tumbling into the water. I guess I was too slow for her, because she decided that instead of being pulled back into the boat that she would just swim ahead to shore. I didn’t really feel comfortable letting her swim from that far out though, so I tried to get her back. She was too far away to grab, so I tried to hook the handle of her lifejacket with my paddle. This just sent her spinning around in the water, at which point my kayak ended up floating ahead of her while she was stuck there spinning in the boat current. I knew it would tip me, but I jumped backwards off my kayak to grab her. I don’t have pictures, but imagine it went something like this.


The moral of the story: Always bring a lifejacket for everyone on the boat, and actually wear them. And maybe don’t do stupid shit like me. Than again, stupid shit can lead to some pretty funny stories.



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